Archives for May 2014

Documentary: “What the Gays Gave Me”

This semester at the University of San Francisco, my film professor asked me to make a documentary about something I am passionate about; turns out I am passionate about gay men.
‘What the Gays Gave Me’ is a short documentary exploring the dynamic friendship between gay men and straight women. Upon moving to San Francisco for university in 2011, I soon realized I get along with gay men better than any other gender or sexuality, and started to wonder why that was. As my friendships grew and evolved into the wonderfully strong bonds they are today, my gay friends and I began to analyze just why we thought this type of friendship works so well.
brittney with kanga
I finally got the chance to put our wine-inspired theories to the test with this documentary. We have all seen this type of relationship portrayed in the media in shows such as ‘Will and Grace’, and even the new movie ‘G.B.F’. The friendships are often times very stereotypical, where the gay man is portrayed as a fashion guru helping his ‘fag hag’ pick out the perfect outfit for her upcoming date. As a self-proclaimed ‘fag hag’, I wanted to show the world, well at least my little USF community, that there is so much more to this companionship.
Luckily my research brought me to Eric, who has been an incredible help to making this documentary into something more than a tale of two best friends. With his innovative quantitative research, and vast knowledge of this subject, I was able to gather enough evidence to show the relationship between gay men and straight women may just be one of the purest forms of friendship out there – due to the ability to build a solid foundation of trust based on the unbiased nature of the friendship itself.
With a big thanks to my amazing friends Taylor, Mark, Margret, and of course, Eric, I was able to complete a project that I am very proud of, and it represents a very large part of my life. Enjoy!
P.S. – I want to give a shout out to my amazing friend Luke Adkins, who was in New Zealand for the filming of the project and was unfortunately not able to make it in the documentary. I love you so very much!

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Brittney Montag is a media student at the University of San Francisco. 

Straight Women Always Loved By Gay Men: Mom!

Happy Mother’s Day, Gay-Straight Relationships fans!

mom and son

Many gay men have great female friends, but the female that has been with them since the very beginning has been their mother. While being careful of the stereotype that gay men and their mothers always have a bubbly relationship, gay men tend to have very close relationships with their mothers. This may because mothers are generally more accepting of their son’s sexuality. This may in turn create a sense of heightened closeness between gay men and their mothers over time.

Michael LaSala, a psychologist at Rutgers University and author of the book, “Coming Out, Coming Home: Helping Families Adjust to a Gay or Lesbian Child,” discusses the closeness between mothers and their gay sons in his review on Psychology Today. One of the things he suggests is that gay men are closer to their mothers because gay men have many shared interests with their mothers, and gay men are more sensitive to their mother’s feelings. Do you agree?

Check out his blog post here.