Documentary: “What the Gays Gave Me”

This semester at the University of San Francisco, my film professor asked me to make a documentary about something I am passionate about; turns out I am passionate about gay men.
‘What the Gays Gave Me’ is a short documentary exploring the dynamic friendship between gay men and straight women. Upon moving to San Francisco for university in 2011, I soon realized I get along with gay men better than any other gender or sexuality, and started to wonder why that was. As my friendships grew and evolved into the wonderfully strong bonds they are today, my gay friends and I began to analyze just why we thought this type of friendship works so well.
brittney with kanga
I finally got the chance to put our wine-inspired theories to the test with this documentary. We have all seen this type of relationship portrayed in the media in shows such as ‘Will and Grace’, and even the new movie ‘G.B.F’. The friendships are often times very stereotypical, where the gay man is portrayed as a fashion guru helping his ‘fag hag’ pick out the perfect outfit for her upcoming date. As a self-proclaimed ‘fag hag’, I wanted to show the world, well at least my little USF community, that there is so much more to this companionship.
Luckily my research brought me to Eric, who has been an incredible help to making this documentary into something more than a tale of two best friends. With his innovative quantitative research, and vast knowledge of this subject, I was able to gather enough evidence to show the relationship between gay men and straight women may just be one of the purest forms of friendship out there – due to the ability to build a solid foundation of trust based on the unbiased nature of the friendship itself.
With a big thanks to my amazing friends Taylor, Mark, Margret, and of course, Eric, I was able to complete a project that I am very proud of, and it represents a very large part of my life. Enjoy!
P.S. – I want to give a shout out to my amazing friend Luke Adkins, who was in New Zealand for the filming of the project and was unfortunately not able to make it in the documentary. I love you so very much!


Brittney Montag is a media student at the University of San Francisco. 

Sex Tips for Straight Women from a Gay Man


Recent research conducted by my colleagues and I have demonstrated that women receive good mating (sex) advice from gay men. However, I had no idea that I would see this phenomenon be performed LIVE! That’s right – a new off-Broadway comedy in New York City has their audience raving for more as a gay man provides straight women with smart SEX TIPS in order to score a sexy guy.


This production is given “TWO WET THUMBS UP” by, and is also based on the best-selling book of the same title, Sex Tips for Straight Women from a Gay Man. In the play, a straight woman (Robyn) attempts to moderate a discussion of the book, but the gay man (Dan – author of the book) aims to entertain those in attendance with a fun, sex-tip seminar. Not only do the actors interact with one another, but audience members are also selected to participate on stage! Additionally, the hunky stage assistant, Stefan, is one piece of eye candy that neither straight women nor gay men would want to miss. According to the Sex Tips play, Stefan might be used for more than just moving heavy scenery as the actors dive into the interactive sex-tip seminar!

To me, this production looks like one of the most hilarious and entertaining plays I have come across, so I recommend seeing it LIVE while you still can! To all living in New York City or going to New York, I would get your tickets ASAP! Consider taking that special someone or your best friend. There is no possible way your night will be a bore. Visit their website at, and don’t forget to LIKE them on Facebook!

Click here for a special offer so you can receive up to $18.00 off your ticket! And keep an eye Gay-Straight Relationships’ Facebook (LIKE US if you haven’t yet!) as I will be giving away FREE tickets to the show – stay tuned!



Housewives and their Gay…Handbags?

While the relationship between gay men and straight women can be viewed as positive, both gay men and straight women may have the potential to turn their relationship sour. Specifically, straight women have recently been criticized for treating their gay male friends as personal accessories. Many gay men have spoken out about this unfair treatment, saying that they would rather be treated as friends rather than personal stylists, make-up artists, or shopping gurus1. Even though this criticism has been targeted towards all women, it may be most relevant to the women who are under the watchful eyes of the media: wealthy women (e.g., the Real Housewives of XYZ).  Why do these rich, powerful women treat gay men as their accessories?


Gay Men’s Perceived Skill. Although not all gay men may be regarded as having superb fashion or design sense, it is possible that these women generalize all gay men as possessing such knowledge. Because women generalize these specific skill sets to gay men, it isn’t surprising that women turn to gay men to assist them with enhancing their appearance or improving their home décor. There may be a few reasons why women generalize these skills to their gay male friends, but I will name one. Because the media embraces the stereotypical professions that some gay men pursue, women who are in the media spotlight may consider it to be commonplace to have a gay male friend who is a designer or hairdresser. Through witnessing gay men in these roles and professions (specifically on the Bravo channel), these women may perceive gay men to be valuable resources for themselves.

Heightened Competition. Not only are female celebrities are expected to look good while on camera, but they are constantly motivated to look top notch in front of their attractive female friends and their wealthy husbands. Because of this, these women may desire to have their outward appearance enhanced on a daily basis. Whether it be wearing the latest fashion trends or ensuring that their hair is flawless, these women constantly feel that they need to look their best. In order to achieve this goal, these women may rely on others to provide such assistance or advice. However, wealthy housewives don’t just consult anybody about beauty. Rarely do we see these women relying on other women to assist them in this respect. Rather, they mostly rely on gay men to take them shopping, do their hair, or put on their make-up. This is most likely due to the fact that women are in direct competition with other women for mating partners (especially in an environment where many women are in direct competition for wealthy, attractive men), thus these women may be less apt to trust other women with such duties. Gay men may be heavily relied upon because of their trustworthy opinion with regards to a woman’s dress or outward appearance2.

Here is an entertaining video to illustrate this phenomenon:


  2. Russell, E.M., DelPriore, D. J., Butterfield, M. E., & Hill, S. E. (2013). Friends with benefits, but without the sex: Straight women and gay men exchange trustworthy mating advice. Evolutionary Psychology, 11, 132-147.